2019 May 31 Journal

2019 May 31 Journal

Hey Journal. Got a late start on the day. My energy levels just plummeted overnight. I came home around 1230am from Miss City Weekly and fell asleep in the car In the driveway for who knows how long…. Had some chips for a snack, laid down, went to sleep by about 2, woke up at 5am to take a shit, laid back down and didn’t wake up again till 11am.  I guess that, in total, that was a decent night’s rest… but wow.  Late late start. 

Woke up with some mild night sweats. Feeling some weird hormonal something or other going on.  :-/

Anyway. Last night was fun. I didn’t think it would be, but it was. Ed Cable was there and talked a lot about how much he loves my show.  What a gracious dude. His co-worker is the one who left such a glowing review on Twitter the other day. He’s my quintessential listener.  

I ran into Sarah* from the Local Arts Organization*. I’ve always had some kind of attraction for her, and I’ve always felt a little something back from her, but last night we spent 30 minutes trying not to make out with each other while we talked. We damn near kissed and she did not hesitate to point that out. It was hilarious. The kiss vibe was so strong I could barely fucking stand it.  GOD. 

….and she’s married. 

Of course. 

FUCK. 

The things I would do to her….

….but not while she’s married.

nope nope nope nope nope nope

Anyway. She has some funding contacts that could be valuable for both my Underground Railroad project and a short doc about that ex conn thrift store here in town, The Other Side. 

After Pride is over, we’ll have some follow up meetings. 

I heard an episode of the Jordan Harbinger Show yesterday that made me feel 10000% better about my life… he talked about how living your purpose does not equate to joy or happiness. It can suck really bad at times. “This is where the drunk writer trope comes from, they are just self medicating from the stresses of living their purpose”.   And the idea that living one’s purpose gives you significance – which is greater than happiness. 

God I love that guy.  He’s been such an important part of my journey. 

Yesterday I emailed Neil Strauss, Adam Carolla, Joe Rogan, and Marc Maron for advice on what to do with this Adam Butcher story situation. I’m going to email Jordan Harbinger, too. He’s been on my show and we’ve emailed before. I think he’ll be a great place to start, after all, he knows all of those guys. 

Last night, a few people came up to me with remarks like “you are killing it. You’ve built yourself and empire. You have blown up.”

God. It’s crazy how it can look that way to others, while the reality of it is… so different. The gap between perception and reality can be so fucking lonely.  

I was also talking with Aspen Perry from City Weekly last night, at length.  She pointed out how much she loves drag shows, and how she herself always felt a bit out of the box being a tomboy…. 

And then I realized what Drag does for people (and my style too, for that matter) – it’s an exaggerated form of what so many people want so badly to do: BE THEMSELVES. 

Jason Cozmo sounds like he’s good to go for an interview next week, too. 

Hell yes. 

I will say this – I do love my life these days. I’m loving the podcast so much. 

* names have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty.


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