2019 May 4 Journal

2019 May 4 Journal

I’m going to spend the day / evening with Makelle and my Mom today. It’s been too long. 

I had a very productive early part of the week and it gave me the momentum to be free this weekend. I had to bail on Building Man with Steve and Kelly. I’m certain they are pissed and disappointed and all the things… 

…and that has to be okay.  I just wasn’t feeling Building Man all week.  When I got my rides done, and when I got paid by my boudoir client, it became obvious that my weekend was opening up for me to leave town and be someplace else. I figured that was Building Man…. And then, Makelle messaged me. 

I knew what to do. Go spend time with my little girl. 

I’m getting back to this business of speaking The Language Of The World.  Being in the flow. Sometimes I feel the urge to be skeptical, to be “scientific”, etc, etc….. and I’ve noticed that the people I spend time around influence that. My time living with Joseph and Caitlyn really pulled me out of my mystical orbit….

….but I am a mystic. 

My life has been changed by mystical experiences, and I’m wasting time to do anything but to give way to that flow of my life.   I like the idea of assigning certain people certain “orbits” in my life.  Those who espouse a particularly skeptical / spiritually argumentative energy get to orbit further out. And not just by happenstance, but by design.  

I think of our solar system… the planets closest to the sun have very hot surface temperatures, and so it must be with my life. Earth is a great metaphor too… it’s a middle ground, a hospitable in between spot, a place where most people can dwell. 

Yesterday I was on a power walk after having bailed on Building Man. I was feeling really shitty for bailing out on Steve. I walked past a pack of surly looking teenagers. One kid, a rotund Mexican looking kid, raised his right hand to the square as he approached me. I raised my hand, we connected in a solid high five that cracked with a satisfying certainty. 

Thank you, Universe, for showing up as that kid. That made my day. 

I made a little video yesterday from my desk talking about ‘what are you supposed to be mad about’. It was 1 minute long and in 24 hours it’s received 868 views, more than anything I’ve ever put out on Instagram or IGTV or Facebook.  Wild. Gary V’s words keep echoing in my mind:

“If you would get on Instagram and make one video every day sharing your world, you would kill it.”


What’s cool, is that the video was originally a FB live video that I just saved to my camera roll and repurposed. I used the “Hey Soul Anarchists” mode of speech instead of talking to the platform specifically. 

This is a great and simple formula.

It’s on. 

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